Hi everyone. My name is Phil, and I am currently serving as the Shepherd's Husband for PNG House Church. Today, I want to share how God used the Growing Life Bible Study and the Shepherd's Conference in Houston to transform my heart.
Before taking the Growing Life class, I want to honestly share where I was spiritually.
For quite some time, I had been struggling with apathy and burnout. My quiet time and prayer life became something I did only occasionally, and even then, it often felt like I was simply checking off a box because it was something I "should" do as a Christian rather than something I genuinely desired.
In ministry, I truly love my house church members, but serving often felt heavy. There would be many nights where I would work, get into stressful and difficult situations at work, come home at 6am, wake up, set up and do house church. I would wonder to myself, "when will this become easier? When will serving start to feel normal?" Some weeks I felt energized and joyful in ministry. Other weeks I felt exhausted and discouraged. Looking back, I realized my spiritual foundation wasn't firm. My walk with God was constantly fluctuating depending on how I felt.
That was where I was before taking Growing Life. Ironically, I didn't sign up because I was eager to take the class. The men in my house church wanted to take it, so I took it for their sake. But God knew I needed it far more than I realized.
There were two lessons God used to begin restoring my relationship with Him.
The first was learning what quiet time and prayer truly meant.
As a Christian, I always knew QT stood for "Quiet Time," but I had never really stopped to think about what that meant. Quiet time means personal time with God in solace.
Quiet time isn't simply reading through a chapter of Scripture and moving on. It's intentionally spending personal, undistracted time with God. Throughout the Gospels, Jesus regularly withdrew to lonely places to pray. He sought solitude to be with His Father.
One of the practical things I learned was that sometimes it is better to slowly meditate on one verse than to rush through an entire chapter.
Instead of asking, "What do I want God to say to me today?" I learned to sit quietly, reflect on His Word, and ask, "God, what do You want to say to me?" I honestly can't remember the last time I had simply sat in silence before God, listening instead of speaking.
The second lesson was learning that ministry is a marathon, not a sprint.
Somehow, I had convinced myself that if ministry felt difficult, something must be wrong.
But Growing Life reminded me that serving God isn't supposed to be easy. It's supposed to stretch us. Like training a muscle, spiritual endurance develops over time. The struggle itself isn't failure. God uses that struggle to mature us and to help us see the joy of salvation in serving others.
Those two lessons answered the questions I had been carrying in my heart.
I realized my apathy wasn't simply because I was tired—it came from a distant relationship with God.
My frustration with ministry wasn't because ministry was the problem—it was because I had been looking at it through my own limited vision instead of God's vision for His Church.
Over those seven weeks with Caleb, God slowly replaced frustration with peace.
And through that peace, He gave me confidence. For a long time I wondered whether I was ready to step into greater responsibility. Today, I believe God is calling me to serve as the Shepherd of PNG House Church. I don't say that because I feel capable. I say it because I believe God is calling me, and I want to obey Him.
That leads to my experience at the Shepherd's Conference in Houston. I feel like the conference reaffirmed God’s promises, not only to me, but to our church as well. I can speak for all the shepherds and shepherd’s wives that attended, God prepared a table for us to eat, rest, and be refreshed.
I also want to give a special thank you to our praise team, who led worship during the conference at New Life Fellowship. I'm normally not someone who raises my hands during worship. But standing there with around two hundred believers singing together, I couldn't help it. Without even thinking, my hands reached out toward God. It wasn't because of emotion alone. It was because I was overwhelmed by His faithfulness.
The sermons and testimonies also reminded me how blessed we are.
Listening to the pastors throughout the conference made me realize how much wisdom and stacked we are in this ministry. Become a shepherd or a marry a shepherd, just to attend this conference. its worth it.
It also reminded me that our church isn't serving alone.
The work we are doing through house churches and youth house churches is part of something much bigger than ourselves.
God is moving through churches around the world.
I want to finish with the verse that God impressed on my heart through the conference.
Psalm 23:1 says,
"The Lord is my shepherd; I lack nothing."
Before Growing Life, I often focused on what I lacked—more energy, more passion, more strength, more motivation.
But God reminded me that if He is truly my Shepherd, then I already have everything I need to follow Him faithfully.
And because of that, I can trust Him to lead me, to sustain me, and to use me for His glory.
Thank you.




